The turkeys are back.
It’s raining, so I’m sitting under my deck, but I can still see them.
There are maybe twelve or so this time. They don’t seem fazed by the rain. They’re gathered under a small pine tree in
my yard, in the spot where the grass stops and the woods starts. I really like
these birds. They’re almost comical. One
of them lifts his feathers slightly and shakes back and forth, maybe to dry
off? They don’t seem to be in much of a hurry to move or to do anything. A few
are pecking at the ground, but not much else is happening. They’ve been outside
in this spot under the tree for about half an hour. I wonder what it’s like to
be a turkey.
I would imagine it would be scary – you never know when
someone’s going to shoot you. These turkeys spend a lot of time in my yard and
my neighbors’ yards, though, and I don’t think people can hunt this close to
houses. Maybe these turkeys are safe. I don’t know where they go when they
leave me yard, though. They go into the
woods, usually, but I don’t know where they go from there. I feel like they
must roam beyond the small section of forest on my property, but I don’t really
know.
I get up to take a picture and they scatter away, off into
my neighbor’s yard. I must have startled them. I feel guilty for disturbing them
in their habitat. When I see these wild creatures it reminds me of my struggle
with eating meat. I recently decided to become a vegetarian, but I already
messed up and ate sushi. It wasn’t even a conscious decision. I went to a
Chinese restaurant with my family one night and ordered sushi. When I got home
later that night, I realized that I ate fish, a once-living thing. I’ve since
resumed my vegetarianism, but I didn’t even make it two weeks before screwing
up. I’m not sure if this sushi accident is reflective of how strong my meat-eating
habits are (or were), or if it means that I’m not that committed to not eating
animals. After all, if I was truly resigned to this cause, wouldn’t I have
remembered not to eat fish? Since the
turkeys have left, I guess I’ll go inside. I still want to go into the woods at
night, so maybe I’ll try to do that this week at some point.
I've seen wild turkeys, too. They're huge! And I've always really liked the coloration of their feathers (I think that that's mostly the males)...they sort of remind me of peacocks. I don't really like birds, so I don't ever get very close to Turkeys if I see them....they're being so skittish makes me skittish, too. But they're fun to watch from a distance.
ReplyDeleteI feel like a lot of people have lapses when they first start out with vegetarianism. I guess quitting eating meat is sort of like quitting smoking, in a way. In both instances, you're body becomes really accustomed to what it is getting and craves it when you cut it off. Most of the meat we eat in this country is usually pumped full of growth steroids and things of that nature, which can cause actual, physiological reactions in us when we eat it.
There is such a lightness and fun energy in this piece, Portia. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I love how, at the end of the first paragraph, you just up and wondered what it would be like to be a turkey. The timing and placement of it was excellent. I laughed out loud. You won me over.
ReplyDeleteI also like how you combined it with attempting to not eat meat. I view choosing to not to eat animal meat as a transition. Like any new practice, it takes simply that. Practice. Holding awareness about something you have not held conscious awareness about the past, is for sure, a new journey. Just notice how it manifests and give yourself time to shift and to know yourself as someone who chooses to not eat animal meat. Let the new experience be and play out as it will. My guess is, the next time you go for sushi, you will either choose to eat raw fish, OR, you will choose to eat an avocado roll instead, but chances are, you will be conscious of the decision you make. It says much about you that you care to try a new way. Thanks for sharing your experience!
I'm appreciating your ongoing consideration of the wild turkey population in your yard. They're such an animal we don't often think about - but I find them fascinating.
ReplyDeleteI also appreciate your struggle with your choice to become a vegetarian. I dislike meat (always did, even as a kid), so I've never really struggled with that choice, but it is a difficult one for many people. Perhaps it will help if you think of it as something that will evolve for you, not chastising yourself for "screwing up." Stephan's comparison is a good one in that this lifestyle choice is not an easy one, and it will take time.